P.O.P

A few weeks ago, I wrote about creating balance between making the holidays feel normal in the face of a pandemic that's made them anything but and making them feel radically different, almost brand new.

Gratefully, I think we were able to create that balance. And now, for New Year's Eve.  Ranks up there with Valentine's Day for me in the sense that there's so much hype around it and I find myself exhausted trying to live up to and and also ignore said hype.  So what to do on this last day of December?  Make it feel like every other NYE when it clearly isn't?  Or go a totally different direction?  Orrrrrrr, Option C; create balance!  

Cliché as it is, I do like the idea of welcoming a new year and having a blank canvas on which to paint whatever's next.  But first, we party.  It's entirely possible that this year, more than any other, will be ushered out in grand fashion.  I'm making a concerted effort to not only focus on 2020 ending, but rather 2021 beginning.  Equally important is acknowledging that there was good stuff in 2020, too.  Was it overshadowed by the bad stuff?  Sure.  Often that was the case.  But our perspective is a powerful tool in reframing what--and how--we see.  Right?

So the party!  This year, it'll be the four of us---and it's been that way before, this isn't new.  I think what's new is that it's the four of us because we really can't (shouldn't) include anyone else.  Story's as old as time; tell me I can't have something, I'll want it that much more.  Quality time as Rayman4 is a gift, no doubt.  But man alive we'll miss our friends. A lot.

Rather than focus on who isn't here and what we can't do, we're going to make tonight all about POP.  Balloons to pop, corks to pop, poppers, pop music and pop foods (popcorn, poptarts--homemade!, popcicles...) to round us out.  But there's a plot twist---because it's 2020---POP isn't more than a goofy theme dreamed up by a Mama trying to make NYE fun for her girls, it's a mindset.  It stands for Power Of Positivity.  A solid reminder to look for, focus on and draw out the positives.  

Spoiler alert--I'm not always sunshine and lollipops (oooh, lollipops--that's a good one!).  Not by a longshot.  I do, however, find a great deal of peace when I look at the bright side.  Sometimes that's easy to do, sometimes it's not--I'll grant you that.  But with practice, repetition and discipline, we can all do a better job of focusing on the good stuff.  Gratitude journals?  A Joy Jar?  Even a list on your phone (I have them going back 3 years!).  However you choose to practice, I invite you to give it a shot and be aware of how you feel when you're really in the groove of noticing the good stuff.

Tonight, we'll create balance; traditional shrimp scampi dinner in the dining room, using our Christmas china once more before it's packed away.  We'll play games and watch a little bit of Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve.  Maybe we'll Zoom with friends or family, maybe we'll pop champagne before midnight.  Balance.  "Old" stuff and "new" stuff.  All of it good stuff. 

Tonight, we're going to POP our way outta 2020 and into 2021.  Who knows--maybe we'll POP all year long!  Maybe I'll get into the habit of asking Mark and the girls "What's POPping" in their lives from time to time, reinforcing the amazing things that happen when we focus on what's positive.

Wishing you all that your heart wants and needs as we welcome a new year.  May hope, peace and joy be yours in abundance.

xo,
Amy

No Spenduary, Back Again!

At least five years--that's how long No Spend January (or, No Spenduary) has been a thing in our house, and I thought I'd share an update on how and why we do this.

Interestingly enough, I can't quite recall exactly how the idea came to be, but since its inception, my Mom and Sister have gotten in on the challenge and we've brought Mark and the girls along, too.  It's funny to hear Abby ask, "Does this count as extra spending?"  Really being thoughtful--and also trying to scheme her way into bending the rules just a little! She knows the drill, and we're glad that she's learning some good financial lessons.

November and December can seem like brutal months for your wallet and budget.  I know this is not the case for everyone, however, lots of little things pop up (and add up!) during that season.  Perhaps this year was different as gatherings were scaled down, or perhaps this year was different because indulging seemed like a good way to heal the hurt of those scaled down gatherings.  

January is a time of lots of new beginnings, right?  People make resolutions left and right, set big goals, vow to be/think/do/feel differently as the calendar turns.  Usually January is when those holiday bills come due and you're reminded of how much extra you added into your celebrations--many times, without really thinking too much about it in the moment.

In the spirit of new beginnings, January seems like a great time to examine spending habits.  Maybe you'll be pleased with what you find or maybe you'll have an eye-opening moment that requires some adjustments. 

For me, this No Spenduary is about making a new budget for our family and a plan to really stick with it.  We haven't made many revisions for a while---and things have changed.  I have a new job, my parking fees are gone, our insurance is different, we no longer have tuition payments for Alyssa...time for a financial check-up.  And we've got some goals; but we all know a goal without a plan is merely a wish.  And wishing isn't going to cut it.  Getting detailed about the goal, the WHY and the HOW will make a huge difference.

What exactly are we talking about here with No Spenduary?  Well, it's pretty simple---nothing extra.  We pay our bills, grocery shop and get gas.  That's it*.  No random take-out "just because."  No "this is new, let's try it" at the grocery store.  No frivolous Amazon orders because "Add to Cart" is so darn easy.  Back to basics.   

We've made exceptions over the years, like the year we needed to make an emergency repair to our garage door.  Not something that could be put off.  But that's the beauty of No Spenduary--that kind of expense stings a lot less when (a) you realize that's all you've spent money on for the month and (b) you've got "extra" in your account because of the no spending!

I'll be eager to see if this year feels easier to stick to our plan because of the many restrictions we're facing.  Going out to eat isn't really an option, random errands on a Saturday morning aren't happening which means no quick coffee on the go and no "but I like it!" purchases at my favorite spots.  

This past year has provided wonderful reminders of what's truly important and taught us that we can, in fact, do more with less.  Was it always easy?  Heck no.  Did I miss dinners out with my family to celebrate report cards and birthdays?  Heck yes.  But I've loved being home more so I can cook and enjoy yummy meals around our own table.  One thing I didn't stop spending?  TIME!! 

Bottom line, it's ONE month of being hyper-aware, disciplined and determined.  Fortunately, the effects last longer than a single month, and we realize that while we don't see ourselves as frivolous, sometimes we are and our wallets know it.

Cheers to keeping up the tradition and cheers to you if this is your first crack at No Spenduary!  Feel free to leave a comment about your plan, ask questions about ours or check back so we can share updates on our challenges and successes!

xo,
Amy

  *Gift cards purchased/received prior to January can be spent--but not a penny over the gift card amount!  

Dinner & Dessert

Dinner and Dessert; because life's about balance.  Even when things seem super off balance, out of kilter and upside down.  A bit of cozy comfort food and a sweet treat that holds special memories is a pretty good place to seek refuge.  Yes?  Yes!!

How about this for irony--finding a yummy slider recipe that's great for a crowd when you can't have a crowd over to enjoy them.  Ohhh, 2020...you're such a delight.

What is a delight, truly, is this easy recipe for Parmesan Chicken Sliders.  We had one of those Food Rut weeks where we were tired of all the "standard" recipes from the coveted Make Again pile, so we searched Pinterest for some inspiration.  Found it!  (thanks, iamhomesteader.com)  

To make these, we used Brioche slider buns from Aldi (so delicious!) and Chicken Fries, also from Aldi.  I baked those first, then cut them in half so the sliders were easier to bite into.  It made a difference!

What You'll Need:
King’s Hawaiian Rolls
Chicken tenders
Marinara sauce
Provolone cheese
Mozzarella cheese
Basil

Layering is the key to making these mini Chicken Parmesan sandwiches. Be sure to preheat the oven to 350°F. You may have to reset the temperature after cooking the chicken tenders ahead of time.

In a sprayed baking dish, lay down the bottoms of the Hawaiian rolls and add the cheese, chicken, marinara, cheese, and basil.  Bet you could brush a little of the butter topping on the buns before you lay on the cheese....mmm! 

Put on the tops of the rolls and smother them with the butter topping.

Butter Topping Ingredients:
Butter
Sea salt
Garlic (we used garlic powder)
Parsley
Parmesan cheese

To make the butter topping, simply mix all the ingredients together and brush it all over the rolls!

Cover the sliders with tin foil for the first 20 minutes. Then, bake them for another 5 minutes or so until the tops of the rolls are a golden brown. These are messy but SO good and easy!

Have a cup of marinara on hand for dipping.  Enjoy!

And what goes better with a cheesy, gooey dinner than dessert?  And this isn't just any dessert.  This treat has been dubbed the Official Cookie of Santa by my girls.  And who could argue?

I remember eating one of these for the first time and knowing, immediately that they tasted familiar, but not sure if it was cheesecake or chocolate or what.  I just knew they were good.  Mind blown when I realized they contained just three simple ingredients!

So I started making them myself, once I figured out what they were, and they've been a staple in our holiday cookie line up ever since.  Everyone gets in on the process; Alyssa crushes the cookies, I roll them, Mark melts the chocolate* and we all throw the sprinkles on them.

They really couldn't be any easier.  Ready?  Okay, here we go...Oreo Truffles.

*Okay, this part isn't easy--or at least it wasn't initially.  Dear GOD the fury of ruining chocolate before we figured it out.  It's a running joke now, and frankly part of the fun!

What You'll Need:

3 dozen Oreo cookies
1 8oz package of cream cheese
White chocolate candy discs
Sprinkles

What You'll Do:

Pulverize the Oreos in a food processor
Add the softened cream cheese to the bowl of a stand mixer with Oreo crumbs
Mix together until incorporated
Scoop and roll into small balls
Chill, on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper
Melt chocolate and dip truffles in to coat 1-2 at a time
Place back onto cookie sheet and dust with sprinkles
Chill again to set before placing into a container
Store in fridge (or consume immediately, whatever--I'm not judging!)
Makes about 3 dozen or so--depends on the size you make them.  

  

Okay, there you have it.  Dinner & Dessert.  Cheers to you, cheers to trying something new to bust out of that food rut and mad props if you exercise any level of willpower around either of these things!

xo,

Amy

Once Upon a Time

It was maybe early May a couple years ago when I asked Abby if she was looking forward to her birthday.  She was 8.  Her birthday was still two-ish months away, but the kid loves her birthday.  She thought for a moment and finally admitted that she was excited to turn 9 because it would be her last single digit birthday (gulp!) and wondered what the party theme would be.

 Happy Birthday!

I asked if she had anything special on her wish list.  Her face broke out into a huge smile and she recounted her 8th birthday and the adventure she had with a good friend.  I took them to the movies, making a quick stop at the Dollar Store first where the girls got $5 each and 5 minutes to get WHATEVER treat they wanted.  The giggles.  Oh the giggles!  Then it was off to the movies, then back to our house for cupcakes, wishes and tons more giggles.  That is what mattered most to her.

That's when I knew, for her 9th birthday (and Alyssa's 4th) the emphasis was going to be on experiences and adventures over things.  Not all gifts come wrapped in paper and bows, neatly tucked into a box or bag.  Some of the best gifts are tucked into your heart.

  

In Central Park, on GMA!

That summer, the Rayman Four celebrated two amazing birthday girls with a fantastic long weekend in New York City.  With help from a handful of knowledgeable resources, we scheduled a bunch of MUST DOs while leaving plenty of room in our itinerary for "whatever we feel like doing--or not doing!"  Reviewing the complete list of what we accomplished makes me tired to this day--and heaven knows we barely even made a dent in all that the City has to offer. 

Ask the girls what they got when we were there and I bet they can't tell you.  But I can assure you they'll describe, in detail, the surprise of seeing Camila Cabello in concert!; seeing the Statue of Liberty for the first time from afar; the subway adventures (and misadventures!); the incredible view of the Freedom Tower from    our hotel room; eating pizza and stopping at the exact moment Abby turned 9 to sing Happy Birthday, the whole restaurant joining in the chorus; catching up with my Aunt & Uncle who treated us to a super cool performance of School of Rock;      Alyssa's birthday pancake and another serenade from a restaurant full of people; somber moments at the 9/11 Memorial and so much more. 

The view from our hotel room

All smiles on the ferry to see Lady Liberty

 

The adventure was so awesome that we booked a whirlwind surprise return getaway last December.  This time around, we had a few new tricks up our sleeves to make things easier---and the memories were every bit as rich.

We packed a lot into our quick visit, this time celebrating Mark's birthday (at Junior's...yes there was cheesecake and yes the entire restaurant sang to him, too!), visiting with Santa, getting a pretzel, checking out the Plaza, stumbling into a cupcake ATM (!!) and seeing The Tree.  If it's cliché to describe this trip as magical, well then please allow me to be cliché.  

  

  

  

Why on Earth am I rehashing two trips to NYC a year (and then some) after the fact?  It's because I'm feeling some kind of nostalgic for them.  For the idea that we could just pick up and go.  I'm fairly certain the December trip was planned in a matter of days--super spontaneous.  I'm jonesing for the energy around the planning, the fun of surprising the girls (we told them as we were zipping along the PA Turnpike!) and the excitement of pulling it off.  Once upon a time---a time that will return eventually.  It will.  

There was a lot of chatter about going to Chicago--what's with these Big City girls?--for the girls' 10th and 5th birthdays.  Sadly, the pandemic took that off the table.  But surely, we thought, surely come December we'll be able to go.  Nope.  So it's still on hold.  And today, I'm feeling a little sad about that.  So I looked at the pictures, smiled as I remembered taking them and I wrote.  That has me feeling better and hopeful that soon enough there'll be a post detailing our adventures in the Windy City.  Stay tuned...and stay safe, wherever you are! 

xo,

Amy 

Eeenie Meenie Miney Moe

Or is it a flip of a coin?  What's the best way to make a decision on Christmas 2020?  I know that the right thing to do is hunker down, listen to science and limit interaction with anyone that doesn't live in my home.  Just because it's the right thing doesn't make it easier to accept or sting any less.  It doesn't.

The choice I'm facing now is, do I lean into this whole "Christmas is going to be super different this year" thing and embrace all that means or do I try really hard to maintain as much of the tradition as I can?  As I've done a zillion times since this pandemic began, I'm arguing with myself, convincing myself of one thing and then contradicting myself right into another point of view.  It's maddening, if I'm honest.

Just as maddening, the realization that this year, there will be no holiday concert for chorus, no Christmas program, no joining Alyssa as she writes her letter to Santa at school, no whirlwind trip to Chicago (requested after last year's Christmas adventure in NYC), no visit to see Santa and no Girls Day Out for a special Christmas treat.  So how to balance?

On one hand, I want to spend a whole weekend baking tons of cookies, old and new recipes, testing and tasting as we go.  The bigger the mess, the better.  The Christmas music blaring, silly Santa hats on our heads and counters being overrun with cooling racks and piles of sweet treats.  

I want to do that, but then I think about how there won't be a cookie exchange, there won't be a crowded dining room table vying for first crack at a beautiful serving tray filled with cookies.  There won't be rubbermaid containers filled with cookies secretly tucked into the backseat of my in-laws car for them to discover when they get home.  I'm not even sure the local ambulance station will take homemade goods this year.  So why bake so much?

On one hand, I want to make the dining room all fancy and pretty and special.  And believe me when I tell you, we eat in there pretty often, so it's not like it's an "only for special occasions" room.  But will it be too sad to eat Christmas dinner there when it's the four of us and no one else?  Again, believe me when I tell you that I am not minimizing my three heartbeats and the value in us being together.  I only wonder if the heaviness of who isn't there will be lightened somewhat if we eat in the family room instead.  On the floor.  While wearing our PJs.  And watching a Christmas movie.  But make no mistake--we'll still use our Christmas china!  

Maybe this is the year we do it all differently.  Embrace the "nothing's the same" vibe.  Maybe the girls stay up until midnight on Christmas Eve, search the skies for Santa and take turns reading 'Twas The Night Before Christmas out loud before opening just ONE present.  I don't know?!

Or maybe we keep it the same--sorta.  Maybe we have (via Zoom) our Christmas Eve Brunch with Mark's family in the morning, go to (via Zoom) Church services as the sun sets and light (our own) candles as we sing Silent Night.  Maybe we have dinner with my parents and sister (via FaceTime)while somehow (executing a virtual version of) breaking Oplatek (Christmas wafer), and tuck the girls in at a "normal" hour. 

Maybe this is the year Santa goes all out because the kiddos have had a rough, rough year.  Or maybe it's the year Santa scales back because we've all learned that often simplicity is where the richness really lives?

Will the trees stay up until mid-January or is this the year we unChristmas on December 26th, eager to be done with unconventional celebrations?

Eenie, Meenie, Miney Moe.  I can honestly make the case for each of the aforementioned "this or thats."  Just when I make a plan or come to a decision, I rethink it and then overthink it and come up with a different decision.  Tons of fun.

One decision I'm glad I don't have to make is to be JOYful!  My girls are awesome examples of that and I'm trying to soak it in, capture it all and save it in a jar if I can.  It's magical to watch them hunt for Ozzie (our Elf) every morning.  It's amazing to hear their conversations with him and with each other.  

It's incredible to think that Abby still believes (or is playing Chicken with me, almost daring me to level with her) and helps Alyssa embrace all that that means.  It's a delight to see the girls take turns ripping a link off of the paper countdown chain and shout out how many days are left until Santa comes.  

It's fun to see the lights, put up our own and say YES to some extra decorations this time around---three trees, swags on the windows and more garland?  Oh sure, why not?!  And while I may be on the "less is more" train, it was impossible to refuse the requests and even more impossible to not be moved by the girls' reactions to the finished product.

Whatever happens on December 24th and December 25th, I know this--Christmas is a season, a feeling--not just a day or two.  And this year, more than any other, it may require a conscious effort to pay attention to and embrace what is rather than what isn't.  To be very clear, I'm quite certain there will be more than one tearful breakdown when thinking about what we're missing.  But through those tears, I hope we'll see all that we can and do still have.

We have family, who, though separated, are healthy.  We have technology that will help bridge the gap between us.  We have a warm, safe home.  We have jobs.  We have food to eat and drinks to drink (Amen!).  We have go with the flow kiddos who will help shape Christmas 2020 and we've got just enough magic to make it still feel special.

Perhaps Christmas will be a hybrid of the options.  Maybe we bake--just not 89,348,347 kinds of cookies.  Maybe we eat in the dining room--just in our jammies!  Maybe we end up starting a whole new tradition that, years from now, we'll reflect on how it all began.

I guess, even if I Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe, I can only lose if I see it that way.  So here's to making the very best out of the choices you're presented with this year.  Whether they're choices you get to make or ones made for you by circumstances, put it all in perspective, cry if you must, then look for the magic.  It's there.  It really is.

xo,
Amy